Saturday, December 24, 2016

Halfway to Baby!

On Friday the 16th, I/we received the best news a parent can hope for at our 20 week appointment. I'm not talking about whether Little One is a girl or a boy, I mean that he or she is completely 100% healthy, active, & right on track (possibly even a couple days ahead!)! Little One has a very strong heartbeat (158), all of the bones are looking strong & well-developed, no indication of any spinal deformities or cleft lip, and even the doc made a comment about how active/squirmy Little One was :) Little One was also very shy; the doc couldn't get a good shot of his or her face because he or she kept their face hidden behind their hands the entire time! Little One also kept his/her legs closed tight, which is maybe not a bad habit to have, haha!

Christmas Day will officially be 21 weeks for Little One and myself! I cannot believe we are already halfway done with this pregnancy; it seems like it was only a month or two ago that I took four pregnancy tests (because the first two were cheapos & the third one might have been an error :P) which of course all came out very positive (& which I may or may not have kept...that's not weird, right?).

Little One has been much more active lately, & is definitely making their presence known more & more each day! There is a lot more movement going on in there (though not so much that it can be seen or felt from the outside quite yet), & I think I have officially reached the "Oh she's pregnant" stage :) I adore my baby belly, even if it does make wearing my work clothes a bit more...let's say "adventurous." I had been a little concerned up to this point because I'd yet to gain any weight, but I also know my BMI was slightly higher than "normal" when I got pregnant, meaning I don't need to gain as much weight as other women (ugh, that freaking BMI chart...I hate it so much. It's so impractical & it doesn't take anything else into account other than height, so how can everyone really rely on something like that? Here's a tiny little box that we're going to try & fit you into & if you're in this category, you must be overweight - because you know, muscle mass doesn't matter - & you better get to used to everyone who sees it telling you that you should really considering losing some weight, even if, for example, you teach a fitness class every week, this stupid little chart claims that you are still not "in shape". Ok, mini-rant over). Well, this week, that definitely changed - my weight jumped up 6-8 pounds (depending on the time of day I step on the scale)! That may not seem like much, and it may seem weird to be excited about gaining weight, but yay!!

Along the lines of fitness, I am now reaching the point where I have to swallow my pride & admit that there are certain things I just cannot do anymore. Like if I have to do the lower impact option(s) in Cardio, it's not the end of the world. Or if I can't walk with the dog as fast as I used to, what really matters is that I'm staying active & finding the balance between pushing myself too hard & not hard enough. More than anything, that has been my main goal through this pregnancy: to stay active. With Little One getting bigger, he or she is starting to press against my lungs more, making it a little more difficult to take deep breaths or catch my breath, & at this stage in the pregnancy, the mom's blood pressure tends to drop somewhat since she is now pumping blood for another little body. This can also make it difficult to catch my breath &/or work out at the level I was before. I just keep reminding myself of all the things that are going on inside my body right now, & tell myself "it is not about you, it's about the baby." That seems to help.

Recently, my sister-in-law & I were discussing & comparing symptoms, & I mentioned that I had been lucky enough not to be plagued with heartburn so far. Apparently, those are the magic words one uses to summon heartburn from what I can only imagine to be the depths of hell. I shouldn't be so dramatic; I only started having it a day or two ago, & so far it's been more of a minor discomfort/irritation rather than all-out pain (fingers crossed that it stays this way...or goes away completely; that would be fine too :) ). Drinking a lot of water seems to help keep it under wraps for me so far, which is good because the chalkiness of things like Tums almost make me gag just thinking about them.

Having said all this, there is one thing I would like address. I think that, in the past, I may have given off the wrong idea about why I made this blog. While I do appreciate all the "hang in there" & "don't worry, it gets better" comments, and I know they come from a good place and people are only trying to help, I don't want anyone to think that this is me complaining. The truth is, I am loving every single symptom, & even when I feel/have felt my absolute worst, there has not been even one brief moment where it ever occurred to me that this might not be worth it. Don't get me wrong; I am loving the support, & all the commiserating comments crack me up :) I started this blog because I am an insatiably curious person by nature, & I can only imagine there are other people out there like me who want to know all the little details & nuances about this experience, but don't want to annoy other people with constant questions. That's where - I hope - my Baby Blog comes in :)

So in closing, everyone is happy, healthy, & ready for the holiday. Husband, Diesel dog, Little One, & I all wish you & your families a Happy, Happy Holiday!

Sunday, December 4, 2016

Well hello there, 5 months!

So, admittedly, that whole "I'm going to post about pregnancy every week" thing totally got away from me. In my defense, however, week 15 was incredibly frustrating for me for personal reasons; we spent the majority of week 16 in the Panhandle for Thanksgiving with my family; and week 17 was also a little rough...but more on that later. So, before you know it, here we are: Week 18! Which, of course, means...we are officially in the second week of MONTH #5!!! Second trimester, baby!

At the risk of inciting the wrath of my fellow pregnant or previously pregnant women, I must say I have been incredibly lucky with my pregnancy so far. While there were definitely instances of dizziness & intense nausea in the first trimester (the majority of which happened before I knew that I was pregnant), I was lucky enough to only be physically sick twice. And aside from the inability to stay awake while sitting in a comfy chair or couch, & using my lunch breaks for 15-20 minute cat naps, the only symptom I really would have preferred to do without was --INCOMING OVERSHARE, PEOPLE!-- the sore boobs. I'm not kidding, it was like they were trying to kill me. Slowly. Tortuously. God forbid I accidentally bump into something or catch an elbow in a crowded room. You know that gasping face a fish makes when it's suddenly taken out of water? That was me if they came into contact with anything.

The reason I told you all of that is so you can bask with me in my current joy. I've read that the second trimester is the easiest part of pregnancy; the nausea generally subsides, energy levels return, basically you feel like yourself...with a teeny tiny human growing inside you. So far, it seems most of this is true, although I still find myself falling asleep on the couch almost every night, & the little bouts of nausea I do still get usually have to do with certain smells, sights, or - odd as this sounds - sounds. Yes, certain sounds will now make my nauseous. Pregnancy is so weird. But hey, at least the girls finally decided to cease their endless torture (I'm not explaining that one. If you've been paying attention, you'll get it).

Another weird thing about the second trimester has been my sudden transformation into a bloodhound. Seriously, my sense of smell could be a super power!
...That would be weird though...
If there is anything that smells the least bit unpleasant, I will pick up on it. Yay me. Milk that's a couple days past its expiration date? I'll find it. Garbage that hasn't been taken out regularly? I'm all over it. Someone forgot to put on deodorant this morning? Well, you get the idea. The one I've been having the most trouble with, however, has been other people's breath. Not just random people around me (unpleasant, but at least I know one of us will be leaving the other soon), but the people I interact with the most on a daily basis. I've been over this in my head, & I cannot come up with a situation in which I offer someone a mint or a piece of gum on a regular basis & they do not get offended at some point. So instead, I'm just going to post my own little PSTPPA (Pubic Service To Pregnant People Announcement): after you drink your coffee (because for some reason, that's the one that gets me the most), please pop in a mint, or chew a piece of gum. If neither of these options appeal to you, I respectfully request you do me the courtesy of standing at least 1 - 3 feet away while talking. This concludes the announcement.

All of that aside, hands-down the best part of starting the second trimester has absolutely been the tiny little twitches I've started feeling deep down (and slightly to the left). Yep, I felt our Little One move for the first time at the end of week 15!! I didn't actually know that was what I was feeling for the first four or five days that it was happening, but some wonderful ladies in a Facebook group I belong to cleared it up for me :) Up to that point, everyone had told me "it kind of feels like gas," and I kept thinking sooooo how do you know it's not? Or "it feels like butterfly wings," but again, I've never had a butterfly trapped inside my body before, so I really had no idea what to be watching for or expecting. In case anyone else has this problem, here's my experience: I thought it was a muscle twitching. To me, that's what it felt like, and after years of working all kinds of different muscles with Zumba, I was pretty used to random muscle twitches here and there, so I didn't pay it much mind. It was very brief, just the smallest *twitch* and then gone, once or twice for the first few days. When it kept happening in the same general area, and started increasing in frequency throughout the day, that was when I started to wonder if it wasn't my Little One saying hello for the first time :)

While we were at my parents' house for Thanksgiving, Husband & I took a day to ourselves & did some hiking through the canyons, just enjoying being out in the country, just us & the dog, & spooking some deer in the process. We ended up hiking about 2 1/2 miles (according to my little FitBit), and when we got back to my parents' house, Little One went nuts! It was like a little drumroll in there, and holy cow it TICKLED!!! Husband of course found this hilarious & was, I think, incredibly proud that his baby had already figured out how to tickle Mama.

There have been a few more instances of intense tickling since then, but mostly we've gone back to a few twitches here and there. The only bad thing about feeling the baby move is when Little One does not move all day, I inevitably assume the worst, & start freaking out. I'm still going to/co-teaching Cardio class every Monday might for just shy of an hour, & last week I pushed myself harder than I had been. I didn't feel Little One move again after that until Tuesday night as I was driving home. I know that may not seem like very long, but for a first-time-mom (who is already super paranoid because everything has been happening so easily & moving along so smoothly that there's just no way something isn't going to happen) it felt like forever, & I was fighting back tears thinking I'd somehow hurt my baby, or worse. I know it's completely normal to not feel the baby move for several days at this juncture (it's still really early - some women don't feel any movements until 20-22 weeks - and Little One is apparently practicing his or her best gymnastics moves in there right now. So he or she may just move to a new position where it's harder to feel all the little movements, or be asleep since he or she is working on a regular sleep schedule at this point), so I try to keep telling myself that every day. I would be utterly lost without my Facebook group & the baby book my fantastic doctor's office gave me :)

At the beginning I mentioned that I've had a couple rough weeks in the second trimester. I had my share of mood swings in the first three months, but (post positive pregnancy test), they were generally limited to crying for either the silliest little reason, or absolutely no reason at all. I even remember walking into the kitchen once in tears, and telling my husband "I'm not even upset about anything right now! There's not even anything wrong! This is so weird!" This trimester, however, the mood swings have shifted & become more aggressive. I find myself losing patience in no time flat, snapping at people around me, and getting frustrated or out-right angry over things that don't merit such a dramatic response. Last week, I was in and out of a slump just up & down every day for the entire week. As soon as I was able to say/vent about what it was that had me depressed/frustrated/upset, it was like it just evaporated & no longer mattered. I've always had a tendency to bottle things up & tell myself no one wants to hear them; everyone has their own stuff going on, they don't need to listen to mine. But since I realized that is the quickest way to diffuse my emotional timebomb, I'm trying to be better about either writing these things down, or opening up to someone. Luckily, my husband is a good sport, & he's been great about letting the pregnancy mood waves roll off his shoulder. But even so, I don't like always venting to him (especially about work because I know from past experience that he gets tired of hearing it). We're still figuring out how is the best way to deal with all these new pregnancy aspects and roadblocks, but I will say this man has been amazingly supportive partner through all the crazy.

Let's see, what else...I want to wrap up this really long post with some positive stuff since I got a little more serious in the middle. We still love our potatoes! French fries, potato chips, mashed potatoes, fried potatoes, we want them all!! Jalapeno poppers have officially been moved to the Do Not Eat List (sad face), and if we don't eat every four hours or so, we get nauseous (& super cranky). Oh! And the one thing I have found that is guaranteed to settle my upset stomach is a dill pickle. I've also had to start getting creative with ways to fasten my dress pants for work. Technically, I can still fasten the clasps, but it's really uncomfortable, & I am all about comfort right now. So far I have discovered that bobby pins, paperclips, and rubberbands do not work for long periods of time. We'll have to wait & see what I can MacGyver-up in the future.

The one thing I am super excited for right now is the first time Husband will get to feel the baby move :) And at the rate Little One is kicking (especially when I'm in the car!), it might be sooner than later!


Tuesday, November 8, 2016

14 weeks 2 days

For the last several years, I haven't been able to stop thinking about babies. And pregnancy. And having babies. And getting pregnant. So I decided, when it finally happened for me, I would write all about it.

So here it is - my first pregnancy post!!

We are officially in the Second Trimester, and feeling pretty good, actually. According to my nifty little pregnancy app, Baby is the size of a troll doll/house mouse/brilliant beet/mille-feuille (apparently it's some kind of fancy French dessert).

Pregnancy milestones so far: no longer able to suck in the tummy (comfortably, at least - Baby does not like being smooshed); ab workouts during Zumba/Cardio are pretty much a no-go; found out the hard way that Baby does NOT like Thai food (bummer - Mama just found out that she does like Thai food only a few months ago), but loves Chinese (also weird, because Mama really doesn't like Chinese food. Do you know how weird it is to crave something you don't even really like?); and even though Mama has a gigantic sweet tooth, Baby really does not like sugar (except cake - we both still love cake).

There are so many other things I want to share about my first trimester (when I found out, how I found out, what it was like), but right now I'm a little distracted, and a rather exhausted from a trying day at work. So I'm just going to stop here for now.

I am going to make a point to chronicle these crazy adventures at least once a week, even if only for my own enjoyment. So here we go - here is the story of the weirdest thing that has ever happened to me: pregnancy.